Unpopular Fact #3: Right- & Left-Brain Theory Is Utter Crap

 

 

 

 

For awhile, it was thought that the left side of the brain was analytical and the right side was creative and intuitive, and that one side or the other "dominates." But that's been completely debunked:

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/08/130814190513.htm

 

Then some people got the ill-conceived idea that if they just ignored left brained things, let all of that atrophy, they'd be amazingly psychic. But the thing is, even if right and left brain theory were true (which it isn't) we need to use our whole brain - even for reading cards. Analysis, logic and critical thinking skills are as necessary as intuition and creativity. Often even moreso.

 

It's not just aspiring card readers who do this. We've come to a point in time where the willfully ignorant think that facts and logic pose an actual threat. Rejection of science and embracing quack cures in the face of a pandemic, for instance, is hastening our descent into Dark Ages v2. So is racism - science itself tells us that race is a construct.  

I could go on, but you get the picture. The decision to close off from facts and stay stupid is, well, stupid.

Unpopular Fact #2: Decks Don't Call People

 We've all seen it: the aspiring reader asks "What deck should I get?" or "Can someone suggest a good beginner deck?" and without fail, people will pipe up and say "Get the deck that calls to you."

Never mind that pasteboard is obviously inanimate, so "the deck that calls to you" gets interpreted as "Do whatever you want", which is no advice at all. It's saying it doesn't matter. Get the one you think is pretty, or the one in the bargain bin, or whatever. But some decks are idiosyncratic. Others are just bad. Nobody can help this person if their deck is nonsensical. And the available reference material for wonky decks is often the LWB/companion book and nothing else.

I'm not saying that new readers should be treated like children. There's no reason not to start with the Thoth, or something similarly complex, if they're reasonably intelligent and that's what they want. But FFS, put some thought into this. Somebody asked for help, so help them. Or get out of the way. Don't just parrot things.

Really.

Stop being a parrot.

Unpopular Fact #1: This Is A Spread

 

A line of three cards with no named positions is a spread. So is a line of five, seven, or nine. Cards laid in squares, pyramids, and tableaus with no named positions are spreads. The cards are spread on the table (or on any available surface, like the boots above.)

A spread is simply an array. It's something spread out. When you invite people for a big dinner, the available food on the table is referred to as a spread. Nobody says the potatoes are the near future or the meat is advice. A ranch is referred to as a spread, because the land is spread out. The items on a newspaper or magazine page, taken together, are also referred to as a spread. The cover for a bed is called a spread as well, because you spread it on top.

I'm not sure how it started, but I've seen people referring to "reading cards without a spread" on multiple occasions in recent years. Stop. It's ignorant not to use a simple word like "spread" according to the definition.

On wellness, privilege, and cards

                                                                        Il Meneghello's Sibilla 1850 features numerous "people cards."

I think I've talked about the wellness model here before. It's essentially the marketing of pricey quack cures to the kind of people who can spend $60+ on a Gwyneth Paltrow yoni egg just to see if it works. There's a more in depth article about it here.

In recent decades, it's been gradually creeping into Tarot. Reading has become progressively more solipsistic. Articles have been cropping up in major publications saying that "Tarot doesn't predict the future", but rather, "it's a tool for self-reflection." Me, me, me. Even the New York Times has jumped on the bandwagon:

 

Source: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/04/01/style/self-care/tarot-guide-for-beginners.html

 

Do those questions remind you of anything?

 

 

They're all self-centered, other than "Why is my mother like that?" which amounts to armchair psychological analysis. They're vague, too. Ask vague questions, get nebulous answers.

 

The privilege is problematic. For all their "self-awareness",  the wellness crowd doesn't seem to mind doing things like continuing to sell and burn sage knowing the negative impact it has on Native Americans. They support a massive market for crystals, knowing the environmental impact and the working conditions of the people who mine them. Life is an endless gold rush to them. Lay things to waste, profit, and move on. I'm not saying that owning a few pretty rocks makes you a jerk. A lot of perfectly nice people have been sucked into wellness. But it's time to stop buying, or at least slow down considerably.

I'm just not seeing any real self-reflection.

And I'm all for skepticism. But my experience with cards has shown me that they really do seem to predict things. I don't know how or why it works. That's what makes it interesting. That's what makes going to a fortuneteller fun for people, that little mystery.

Tarot was not always nonpredictive and self centered. Until the 70's or so, it fell into two broad categories: traditional fortunetelling, something that mainly deals with the future and other people, and occult Tarot, which was often meditation, study and contemplation, but could also be used for predictive reading. Here is a wonderful bit about incorporating the Sephiroth and paths:
https://www.tarotforum.net/showpost.php?p=4312387&postcount=17

 

And then we started seeing "codes of ethics" with items like this: 

"Questions relating to third parties e.g., partners, family members, colleagues, will either be re-phrased or declined."

I read cards in the traditional way, and while others are of course free to do what they think is right, I resent the implication that readers like myself are somehow less "ethical" because we read cards the way people have for the last few hundred years. I won't disrespect a client by changing their question, and I do read about other people. We don't live in a vacuum, our lives are impacted by others. But no matter, you do you. Just don't try to push it on me.

 

Wellness marketing has a LOT of money behind it, so they've been more successful than I would like in marginalizing us. (Note how the example questions in the NYT article cited above are allegedly from "the experts." I doubt these "experts" could read their way out of a wet paper sack.) I'm fully aware of their intentions toward us, but their efforts are doomed to fail. The old books, the good books, and the better online content are proof enough that we've existed for a long time, they haven't erased us, we're still here. And we're good.

Luckily, the wellness model so far seems limited to Tarot and "oracle"/affirmation decks, at least as far as cards go. I haven't seen it applied to Lenormand, Kippers, Sibilla, playing cards, etc. And while I'm knocking wood that it never happens, it would be very difficult to force these decks into a wellness mold. These decks and methods center on our interactions with others, and how they impact our lives. Here is a Kipper spread - note the people cards:

These systems don't lend themselves well to the modern, non-cartomantic methods that have been shoehorned into Tarot. Which brings me to the point:

If you subscribe to the wellness model, I can't help you with Lenormand, Kippers, etc. I don't see how any traditional reader can. And if we are talking in an online venue where the rules state that the things people normally ask about have to be "rephrased" and "third party readings" are forbidden, I'm effectively gagged. It's not that I'm taking my ball and going home, I really can't help you. It's not workable.

On Kipperkarten...

 

There is an old thread at a ruined message board where someone asked about the difference between Lenormand and Kippers, and for some reason, my brain only decided to say something about the difference between scenic and non-scenic cards today. Brains are ornery and a little bit evil. Ask Hannah Hillam.

 So I thought I'd talk about that briefly today. The difference is not "Stop Cards." I never found any German readers who had heard of them prior to Toni's book. It's a useful book*, and direction is important, but we don't have to let that shove us all over the board.

Rather, the difference is this: those scenic Kippers have mnemonics all over them! Lenormand images might or might not have background imagery that gives extra clues, like trees on the Park, House, Sun and Roads, as a visual cue for the "many trees" rule from the PL Sheet. But the Rider is essentially about the Rider, the Clover about the Clover, etc. But the Kipper cards have a lot going on in each card, and you can use that. It's a little like RWS that way, but don't go off on a tangent and say things like "I feel like she's the whip the carriage driver is holding." Everything has its own intended meaning. Here's a simple one:

The title translates to "Good outcome in love." And we have paired doves - that meaning is obvious. But there's a dog, too - it can also be about friendship and loyalty. Ivy clings, but the fact that it's green and growing shows it's a good kind of clinging. The low wall encloses and protects, but it's not impassable. "Hold on loosely", as the old song says.

So it's not "The Birds", or "The Dog." It's about a successful relationship with someone. It might or might not have a sexual component, but it's deep.

Here's another:  

It's the Meeting card. The man looks amorous. The woman is still unsure, she hasn't decided one way or another. She's still thinking about it. Now look at the Cupid on the wall, the Cupids in this deck are important. Cupid holds his arrow aloft, but we don't see his bow. The arrow isn't even nocked, the point is up, and he certainly hasn't shot it. This could progress into romance, friendship, business, or enmity. It's simply a card of getting together. Que sera sera. 

Now, in case anyone tries to read a "Fool's journey" type numerical progression into the cards, we have No. 3: the Marriage card. We're only at 3, but this couple is already committed, and the woman is pregnant. It doesn't have to be literal, but it does indicate an established relationship, whether love, marriage, friendship, or business. There's a strong bond here: 

Trees and mountains form a protective barrier behind their backs. There's ivy again, and a house to show that they're settled. And there's that low wall again.

So you can see it's very different from Lenormand. But it's not RWS, either. Kipper is very much its own thing, and it makes a superb reading deck. 

For those who don't know, I blogged some basic Kipper meanings back in 2013. You can find them here. https://fennario.wordpress.com/2013/03/23/a-traditional-kipperkarten-primer/
Feel free to use them as you wish, but do not share them without attribution or claim them as your own. They're copyrighted under the DMCA.

*I do strongly object to the fact that she advocates using the opposite sex Hauptperson/Main Person card as the gay partner. A feminine lesbian should not be represented by the bearded male Hauptperson, nor a gay man who identifies as 100%  MALE by the female Hauptperson. When in doubt, always, ALWAYS ASK.

PS - URGENT. Help trans kids and their families escape Texas:

 https://www.gofundme.com/f/fundraising-to-protect-my-daughter

 
https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-us-move-our-trans-teen-out-of-texas  

https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-us-move-isa-to-safety  

 

https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-a-mother-of-trans-child-in-texas  

 

https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-me-move-my-daughter-to-a-safe-state 

 

https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-a-trans-family-get-out-of-texas 

Etc. Help somebody, even if it's just a little. Every dollar counts.

And keep a good thought for the people in Ukraine. Please take a moment to watch this:

media (mis)representation

Some of us have been having a discussion about Tarot in print media like news sites and magazines. I've noticed a somewhat disturbing trend these last few years: they seek out instagram influencers and the like who are mainly using the cards as a kind of prop or accessory to brand themselves. And they say things like this:

"Before she starts a reading, she always prepares people by saying she can’t predict the future."

 “People think it’s about predicting the future, but it isn’t. It’s about the present, and it can be very empowering."

“I thought it was all about telling the future and predictions and making money off people’s fears. I went in very sceptical (sic) and thinking I would find it all hooey but instead I came out with a huge amount of respect for tarot readers and tarot as a practice. A good tarot reader doesn’t tell you what’s going to happen, they simply allow you to think your question through in a different way.”

And there's this:

“Tarot is great for anxiety. While you may not be predicting the future, you can slow down and shuffle and look at pretty pictures and say, ‘Oh yeah, I’m overthinking this.’ ”

They aren't even reading the cards, they're using them as a pacifier.

See where one draws a false equivalence between "telling the future and predictions", "hooey", and "making money off peoples' fears"? She then goes on to say that "a GOOD Tarot reader doesn't tell you what's going to happen." It's very clear what she means.

Attempting to destroy business rivals is nothing new in this game. I remember the certification rackets being really bad about that. But what's disturbing about this is that it's is not some fly-by-night blog or website. It's the Guardian, the WaPo, etc. It lends these bimbos a false air of legitimacy. And these publications are purposely not talking to readers like us, or even to established Tarot writers who have managed to make a name for themselves. These articles are simply bully pulpits for wannabe Kardashians.

If you think about it, the Celtic Cross is a longtime popular spread that everybody knows, and it has positions for Before You/near future and the Final Outcome. There are altered versions, but most of those versions have future positions. You can't tell me that these publications can't find anybody who uses the Celtic Cross. Surely they bump into a lot of people like that, but they're not writing about them. They're purposely marginalizing predictive readers like us.

To the little bimbette and her ilk who claim we're "hooey", "making money off peoples' fears" and add that "a GOOD Tarot reader doesn't tell you what's going to happen", I have one thing to say:
Honey, I was reading professionally when you were still hopping back and forth in your daddy's nutsack trying to keep from going in your grandma's mouth. Get bent.

Someone actually did manage to find ONE link with a predictive Tarot reader in it. Of course she's dead last, lumped in with disreputable D-list "celebs" who bill themselves as psychics of various kinds. She claims to access the Akashic records, doesn't seem to have progressed beyond single card draws, and relies heavily on cold reading techniques for the first two predictions. This is the third:

Um, the Magician is about potential. Some things will look promising, just like they did last year and the year before, but COVID isn't going anywhere. You don't even need cards for that. The people who study COVID say we're in it for the long haul. It won't be like this forever, but it's certainly not going away next year: https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2021/10/29/1050465159/covids-endgame-scientists-have-a-clue-about-where-sars-cov-2-is-headed

Someone else managed to find a PDF copy of an old article that featured Rachel Pollack. It was in regards to her book about the Dali Universal Tarot, which dates it to 1985. Thirty-six years ago. And even that was a hatchet job.

I get it. There's a coordinated push to discredit and marginalize us. Some corporate overlords somewhere decided it would be profitable to push the "predictive readers are badwrong" narrative and hype the Gwyneth Paltrow-style flakes, for reasons I am not privy to.

So I am going to explain here what I do, and what I know card reading to be.

A person learns their system. This involves study, practice, and rote memorization (which does not mean using "canned meanings" or discarding instinct and intuition.) Cards mean things and we have to remember those meanings. It's learning a language. It's like remembering that the table is la mesa in spanish.You don't have to remember pages of meanings and combined meanings for every card. Just a core essence of each card that can be unpacked and put into context. And then we have to practice doing that, in addition to making the most of the visual cues and other techniques. It takes some years to gain fluency.

Predictive reading does work if you do it correctly. I can predict a lot more accurately with cards than I can by guessing. I don't call myself psychic. And I don't know what I'm interfacing with (if anything) that makes it work. Maybe it's something in my own bony skull. Maybe it's guides, maybe it's ancestors, maybe it's something else. I honestly have no idea.

People come to us and they have questions. These questions always come down to things like love and money. Nobody asks to be psychoanalyzed, and I don't have the degrees and licensing to do that anyway. I'm a fortuneteller.

Now to address the predatory scam reader trope. People pay traditional readers to read cards, so we read cards. We translate what's on the table. Very simple. We're not lying to people, we're telling them what the cards say. It's beyond our control if they want to believe it or not, act on it or not, or just take it with a big grain of salt and view it as all in good fun. They're adults capable of making their own decisions. We only relay the message.

That's it. It's not difficult to comprehend.

 

Conjure Cards & the courtroom

Today is Friday and we're on day four of the Rittenhouse trial. The above spread is not intended to ask if there would be a guilty verdict - it's a foregone conclusion that there won't be. The judge is biased and the jury probably is, too. There may be a few who comprehend that going out of your way to strut around with an AR at a protest is just looking for an excuse to shoot people, and that he murdered those two men in cold blood in front of multiple witnesses, but this is America. Common sense will be shouted down. And meanwhile Leonard Peltier has been in prison for almost half a century for a crime that the government knows he did not commit.

Rather, I asked if there would be a verdict today at all.

The first card is the Jack of Hearts, the Bass Fish. This card does not carry a reversed meaning. One of the meanings given is "a young person who is selfish and only thinks of themselves." Yeah, that's Rittenhouse.

The next card is the 2 of Spades, the Broken Bottle. It's upright. The instructions say "It identifies disputes between two subjects, or within a particular environment." This is why the jury is taking so long. They're arguing.

The third card is the King of Diamonds, the Bear. It's another one has no reversed meaning. It's normally a good card. But the instructions also say, "...his actions and place will be determined by the company of cards he keeps." He's paired with a card representing Rittenhouse and a strife card, so he's not good. I think he might be the judge. It's also a money card, there's most likely some bribery involved. It's only somewhat likely we will get a verdict today, or very soon (the cards are red - black - red: not a strong yes, more of a "soft" one) but it won't be satisfactory at all. Things are all gummed up.

That's ALL too bad. Every bit of this. I personally think a pair of boobs tattooed on his back would be a great look for ol' Kyle. But I can't say I'm surprised. Look at Zimmerman.

Even the pendulum wouldn't give me a hard 'yes.' It would only swing 'Maybe.' The future is still soft and bendy on this question, apparently. Something else has to happen before things are set in stone.

This is the deck I used. I like it so much, I fangirled all over Goodreads. You can read the review here:

Conjure Cards: Fortune-Telling Card Deck and Guidebook by Jake Richards
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This is a deck by a reader, for readers. That's all too rare these days, since a lot of non-reader artists see decks simply as a sales venue without having a good grasp of the subject. That's not the case here. Reading-wise, the Conjure Cards rank right up there with Lenormand. It reads clearly, and it reads true.

I was a bit skeptical about authenticity when I first ordered the deck. But after spending not even 24 hours with it, I was convinced this is authentic Appalachian folklore and Jake is the real deal. He just knows too much history and folklore. It's even more impressive because he looks really young. He couldn't have gained this depth of knowledge and understanding from google, he had to have actually grown up with all this. I'm reading his "Backwoods Witchcraft" book, too. The little moth on the cover made me think it would be a good expansion on the deck, and it is. But this deck can be used effectively on its own. You just need the cards and the instructions, nothing more.

The box is a miniature cigar-box style, it's sturdy and it's textured somehow so the cardboard feels like wood. Even the interior has been given a lot of care and attention to detail. Yes, there's a little issue with it not closing all the way. It might loosen up in time, though. In the meantime, I tied a loop of twine around it, loose enough to slip on and off but snug enough that even if the box gets knocked off the table, the cards and LWB won't scatter. I think the twine fits the cabin aesthetic of the deck.

The cardstock is good and sturdy, it's matte, and I can riffle it. The cards are a bit big, a little shorter and broader than a standard RWS Tarot. Fine for smaller spreads, and it shows the details. If I want to do larger spreads, I can just clear the table. But most of the time, all I need is a small spread. A second edition in bridge or poker size would be nice too, but these are perfectly workable.

The images are folk-arty and well executed. They're hand-drawn and painted playing cards with Appalachian dream symbols drawn over them. Everything is there for a reason: for example, the 3 of Hearts looks like a mistake at first since the Hearts were obviously painted over Diamonds. But one of the meanings given is "wrongs will be righted", so the "mistake" is actually a mnemonic!

The LWB is very good. There's a clear explanation of each card. Mr. Richards says they're derived from a playing card method he learned from his mother, matched up with traditional Appalachian dream symbols. Everything dovetails perfectly.

Since these are playing card based, some (not all) of the cards have reversed meanings. I seldom use reversals with other decks since I read by attendance (neighboring cards), but I'd strongly encourage their use with this deck. They can make all the difference between a bump in the road and a warning about something truly dire! It's an important distinction to make.

The King and Queen of Hearts are the male and female significators, but he makes it a point to note that the binary gender approach is not a requirement, and offers an alternative way of choosing significators: basically, using the card you identify with most for yourself, and the one you're most drawn to for your partner. There is none of the homophobia that people associate with rural America in this deck. Nor is there racism. Jake Richards himself is Melungeon, and the cards are a wonderful expression of the blending of Eastern Cherokee, African American and British culture. It's a beautiful perspective.

The last part of the LWB is spreads. They're the classics that people tend to think of as "Lenormand spreads" these days, but are actually the old standard for card reading in general: a Line of 3 that he suggests reading Past-Present-Future, or alternately, using as a yes/no spread. A 3x3 relationship spread where the outer columns are the people and the center column is what's between them. And one he calls "The Bullfrog", which is a 9x4 Grand Tableau that employs a counting method.

This is the best-reading new deck to be published in my lifetime. I don't say that lightly.

Conjure Cards are available here: https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/1578637449/